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Lonely Today

She sits on the stars, in hopes to shoot the moon
In quiet hope and desperation, that love is coming soon
She wants to float like an angel, with hearts on its wings
In the echoing solarium, she rocks back and forth and sings
Like sleeping in sunlight, and dances in thunder
She watches the fire, her toes curling under
In a moment’s fleeting thought, and rapt contemplation
Her heart begins to race, in endless anticipation
Science bound her to his heart, a chemical reaction
Pushed away by common sense, held by physical attraction
Dusk has long passed, and she is waiting still
She prays not to cry, but she knows that she will
She has questions to ask and nobody to answer
Like weights on a butterfly, or chains on a dancer
She’s been sitting here all day, and here comes the night
Tortured artists painting rainbows, living life in black and white
Feelings were a sham, it was cold analysis from the start
It was broken, angry, piercing love; paralysis of the heart
The wind blows faster, and he’d better hurry
She smiles through whispers of joy and of fury
She has tried to run before, but she never got too far
She was scared and she was helpless, cause that’s just who we are
She watches the road, just waiting alone
As dawn begins to break, she falls asleep by the phone
She always does this to herself, and he never comes around
She has an overwhelming tendency to always let herself down
With his smiles and her tears and the lights to remember
She packs up her things and goes out to feel September
She doesn’t know where she is going, she has lost sight of all her dreams
And her inflated, broken, shell of a heart, is bursting at the seams
She knows that people will judge her, but she decides not to mind them
If she can take a step towards freedom, if she can even find them
She will make them move themselves, to a place where they can see
That breathing in cold air alone, is desperate beautiful vacancy
She used to be original, and fiercely independent
She’d make isolation productive, she had always been transcendent
Like a prey shied away, without any predator
She’d never turn against herself, now she’s her own competitor
Never second guessing, she would give him what he’d want
She would smile, knowing she’s lucky, and act so nonchalant
She had all this wasted strength, like a lion on a trolley
Never thinking there was more to life, than lukewarm melancholy
She never should have stayed that long, no one told her that she should
With him she had become something, she never thought she would
She loved the light in his eyes, when they walked alone at night
She kind of hoped he’d hurt her, every time that they would fight
All the dresses that she wore, and the diamonds that he gave her
The times he broke her soul inside, were not enough to save her
She kept thinking it would get better, in a circle with no conclusion
Threw herself on the ground, a multidimensional delusion
She just wanted to feel something, which is what she could never say
She forgot to let go of what held her back, and live simply for today
She was seeing what she already knew, like pedestrians in disguise
And the midnight train to New York City, captured wonder in her eyes
She believed we could stand together, everyone find something to be
We can live to feel the energy, and just be thankful we are free
This change rings of the end, like demolition bells
And we have much more power now, than our premonition tells
She has undergone the unthinkable, but today is the day
A woman now is infinite, and she is gonna be okay
When he finally comes home, he’ll see a note she left on the shelf
It says, ‘I loved you more than anything, because I forgot to love myself’





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