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Not Spoken

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Why do I stay?
You and your demeanor disgust me.
Why didn't I say those words? Just
A handful of words to be thrown to the ground is all it would take.
But then I would sacrifice something More Important.
I wouldn't sacrifice him for you.
No matter how Horrible.
I can't stand you. I can't stand your looks, what you believe in.
I can't understand anything about you.
I know you're cold. But I can't pity you, no matter how
Traumatized you are.
I can't see past what you've done to me, no matter if you said sorry.
It doesn't take it
Back.
It doesn't take away the tears I shed.
It doesn't take away the anger.
The ice-cold fury.

I would say them to you, but I don't want to say goodbye to him.
I would, but I couldn't live without him.

So sneer that you have me in this position. One day I'll get back at you.
I swear it.

I hate how you can't do a thing for yourself.
I hate how you always interrupt me.
I hate your laugh.
I hate how you dress.
I hate how you're crass.
I hate how you think he's yours.
I hate how you say bad things about her.

But overall, I just hate that I can't say those
Words.
The words that would make a difference.



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