Why Am I Not Good Enough

December 23, 2010
By , Eatonville, WA
Start acting like someone you’re not he said to me.
Go on be Stacey, be Jessie be anyone but you.
You’re not good enough I want someone who acts the part.
I want my girl to fight back.
Daddy don’t you understand I did what you told me I changed you I was
Back in 7th grade you told me don’t be so quite try to stand out, don’t be such a tom boy
Go on be someone you’re not
And I did I lost my fight and calmed down
I started acting like a girl
Just like you said
But now I’m not even good enough for that
You say you love me
but if you really loved me you wouldn’t try to change me
You would want me to be me
I want you to love me
So I try to change everything I am
But every time I do
You just want me to change again
When will I be good enough for you to say you’re perfect.
Perfect enough for you to reach out to me and hug me
Even tell me that you love me this time for real
I don’t even really try anymore at anything like you pointed out
Because I’m tired of being everything I’m not
I miss myself, and I wish I was good enough for you to say
I really love you Daughter
Daddy don’t you see I hate myself for everything I am
I don’t need you telling me that I’m not good enough
I already know
I don’t know how much more I can take
You are my Dad
I love you and I care for you
But you’re starting to push me away
I feel like I’m climbing up a mountain
And I know I will never reach the top
But still I just keep climbing
Wanting to reach the top
Never quite making it.
I want be everything you want in me
But just I can’t
Daddy I’m not happy
But I know I love you so ill just keep climbing
Never stopping
I hope one day I’ll reach the top
And finally be good enough for you


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