What has all this meant?
I was confident
Before these silent thoughts were spoken.
Now I feel abandonment,
Hesitant to leave the resentment I have
Because my heart is absant
In denile
So I smile,
While hiding the misery
With no possibility
Of a happy memory.
And I ignore the war
Of heart and mind
And restore myself
Back to before
My heart was nailed to the door.
A punching bag.
Dare to hit?
I'm already broken,
Chocking on rejection.
Dealing with deception.
Craving a connection,
A direction to take,
With decisions to make,
And habits to break.
So I wait
While I debate
On things I can and cannot tolerate,
And eliminate the wrong.
So carry on
Without hate,
Without fear,
Now watch me walk away
And disappear
Into the atmosphere.