Missing

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Sometimes it occurs to me
That I am missing something
Something important.
For a second
I glimpse the empty place in my heart
And think
“Isn’t something missing?”
but then the feeling is gone.

I wonder if I’ll ever know
What it is that I’m missing.
I wonder if I’ll ever fix it.
And be a whole person.
I wonder what that feels like.

I could only do that
If you stayed by my side.
You mean so much to me,
And if you left
I’d lose not only you
But myself too.
Just when I was starting to come closer
To finding me.
Don’t leave.
Please.
But if you do leave this whole world,
This life,
But choice,
As you have attempted
Six times
This month alone,
I’d have no alternative
But to follow.

Don’t make me.
I don’t want to,
But if you really did
Follow through,
I’d have nothing else.





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