Express

December 5, 2010
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I know I’m not writing as usual
I’m just floating in this
Perpetual limbo
An epic state of confusion
I just can’t even begin to express properly
I’m running out of ideas
Faltering
Those slight steps onward
I apologize
I’m getting worse
Obviously, something’s wrong
I’m not solving my own problems
Simply due to my foolish tendencies
People just stop paying attention
Plus I have nothing to work at
Painting seems fretful and unappealing
So troublesome
My laziness is increasing
Philosophy takes time away from my friends
I don’t want to leave them
Yes, I’m scared
The literal straightforwardness in this
Is quite surprising
I don’t know what I want to say
Anymore
It’s just flying away from me
I don’t feel like putting this in code
I, too, am losing my skill in that
I’m desperate
It’s getting worse
I don’t want to close off
I fear being shallow
Once again
My apologies
I don’t have a friend
In which I can share everything
And they can share equal as much
Very frustrating this is
There’s still an option
But he’s far away
And too hard to reach
There’s a list of people to choose from
But I just can’t make that decision
I’m scared
Then people say things
Some compliment me
And I feel decent
But it’s practically
Lies with touches of truth
Because they just don’t know
Maybe they do
But I still talk to them
Try to find out more
Doesn’t matter
I’m furthering my reach on people
Trying to find someone
Some are gone
Some I can’t compare
Some just don’t want to share
It’s okay
Then I worry too much
It’s bad
I need to stop
It’s hard to ignore stuff
That stares you in the face
I don’t mean to make you
Feel guilty
It’s me, not you
Hopefully, I’ll figure it out
There’s something I’m missing
Dans ce petit chemin
Je ne sais pas
Too much for me
I can get it
I can accept it
Just please start explaining
I’m lost
This eternal rant needs to end
I can’t afford to be on edge
Find some middle-way
But I can’t
There’s nothing to make peace with
I can’t change
Anything
A bit
I have sincere trouble
Swimming and staying afloat
In this huge ocean
I’m losing energy
Je ne sais pas
There’s too much
I need to tone it down
Run away
But I cannot abandon
Love
But “Hate is shallow
Love must be too”
I don’t know
I need a best friend
I miss people
I miss being innocent





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