Breakdown

December 2, 2010
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The white fire of emotional breakdown
Licks at my tender heart
Different feelings take over in an instant
Swinging from one to another
Such as the wild monkeys of South Africa

Anger
Red clouds my vision as I see you with him
A white hot metallic taste on the tip of my tongue
I realize its blood my teeth produced from my inner cheek
A scream bubbles up from my gut. I swallow it down

Depression
The world passes by way too slowly
Dark thoughts cloud my judgment
That razor in the corner my only escape
More and more tempting with each passing glance

Fear
I curl up in that same corner keeping to myself
Shaking as a puppy does when left alone in the rain
Damp from the rain of tears I shed
Progressively growing more and more suicidal

Death
I can’t take these emotions anymore
That razor already dulled against my cuts
Blood soaks my shirt, sticking it to my arms
I welcome the awaiting fires of hell
Where my lust for pain shall finally be fulfilled





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