Equal

how have I let you do this
drive us both
into the ground
spit in my face
I crawled
beaten
after your sprinting heels
running away again
you have no respect for me
and I have no respect for me either
but that's on you
your fault
you took it away
you didn't want it
but you took it anyway
and now
the cork has popped
on all my rage
that I kept
to bubble
shoots out
a champagne fountain of loathing
I think you are relieved
I finally broke
finally poured over
finally told you all those things
those things I didn't tell you before
those things I couldn't tell you before
now they were freed to the air
some found their way to your ears
some didn't
and now
only now
after the apologies have fallen flat
and been swept up and thrown away
now you respect me
but I don't want it anymore
now that we're equal
I can hate you back





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