Brilliance

November 20, 2010
By Savanne BRONZE, Colfax, California
Savanne BRONZE, Colfax, California
4 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I was never going to amount to much anyway, but now, statistically speaking, there's a better chance that some part of me will go on to greatness somewhere in the world. I'd rather be partly great than entirely useless." ♥ -Unwind


Like a painted canvas

She is luminous, and iconic,

Her mind and focus are criticized,

Then constrained and shrunken.



Her face, although dissimilar to mine

Is breathtakingly brilliant.

She moves with a fireless hope.

Her perception of the future is now.



She has no apprehension,

No sadness.

Imagine the love she has to offer,

And accept her.

The author's comments:
I hope people will enjoy my piece.

Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 2 comments.


Savanne BRONZE said...
on Dec. 10 2010 at 6:03 pm
Savanne BRONZE, Colfax, California
4 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I was never going to amount to much anyway, but now, statistically speaking, there's a better chance that some part of me will go on to greatness somewhere in the world. I'd rather be partly great than entirely useless." ♥ -Unwind

Thanks! for the constructive critism

mgb405 BRONZE said...
on Dec. 10 2010 at 11:39 am
mgb405 BRONZE, Plaquemine, 70764, Louisiana
1 article 0 photos 5 comments
In this poem, I like the description of the girl. "Like a painted canvas/She is luminous, and iconic" (l.1/2) I think the words you use are perfect. Although the words you use seem perfect, the rhythm isn't.


Parkland Book