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Speak Up or Sit Down?
Unfeeling hands,
Face with no eyes,
Never realize,
What in me lies.
Speaking feelings hurts,
Burns my tongue like hot coals on the way out.
To give them voice is to give them power,
So I'm silent.
But then again,
Maybe ignorance is not so blissful,
As to hold it in.
My resolve,
Is unresolved.
Speak or silent,
Question roils and boils in my brain.
Speak up or sit down?
Tell them the truth,
Honest in its brutality?
Or hold back?
Reverse, rewind,
Dam it, clog it,
Eats me inside-out.
Feelings that gnaw,
Grind, rip, burn at me.
Hack away at my nerves,
Already so frayed,
And afraid,
Of choosing.
Hurt them,
Or myself?
Again I say,
Speak up or sit down?
Indecision,
Torn in two,
Storm in my brain clouds my judgement,
Creates the indecision which tears in two.
Clouds of emotion,
The endless roller coaster,
Reach the peak,
Down the hill,
Hit the bottom,
Nothing to do there but sit and think.
Silence or speak?
Clouds open up,
Pour out rain,
Each drop a different situation to come,
From my being verbose.
With a storm comes thunder,
And with that, lightening,
And each strike a consequence,
Of my refusal to say what my heart does.
Each consequence a dose of venom,
Fatal in its rush to my heart,
Coursing through my veins.
Tell someone,
Tell anyone,
But my lips come to life,
Grow a mind,
Glue themselves together,
Sew themselves shut.
Add a lock, toss away the key.
It hurts me, but it saves them.
So again I say,
Speak up, or sit down?
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