Ultimately, I always saw myself
as a dreamer-
A frivolous
practitioner of the
unlikely and the unorthodox,
flying on waves of the imagination
daring to squint through
the madness and catch a possible
glimpse of the hamster-wheel.
In my mind I see
butterflies tap-dancing on treetops;
rogue elves canvassing the unknown.
I see crackerjack
fruit trees but also licorice
nooses.
I see
white-bearded politicians parading the streets
as Santa Claus,
their toy sacks filled with red-tape
and revenge-
on all the prom queens
who never stopped the rings-
they never answer the cries,
now they’re vindicated.
While we stand idly by,
heads bowed,
lips shut,
eyes open
-just barely though.
But like I said,
I’m a dreamer.
I live in the fantastical
world of candy canes
and denial, sitting
at my window watching the red-robed
mafia dons ride
to and fro-
to and fro
until some god-sent thin lips
speak up-
speak up
past those lips so red from
being forever bitten-
holding back cries
of the inevitable,
from all the other
dreamers who are
just like me,
who sit under trees
watching clouds
counting sheep
taking leaps-
into nevermore.

To be honest,
I’ve always seen myself as
damned.