Emotions pour out of me all at once. My heart has been ripped in two. You've left my heart to bleed and die out. Left me here to pick up the broken pieces of my shattered soul. You think it's because I still love you? How foolish and egotistical of you. I hate everything that you are. I spent so much of my energy and time on you. What a waste. Such a shame. What hurts me now is not that you left. It's self inflicted. My pain is because of all the years I spent getting betrayed over and over. You knew exactly how to break me down. You knew what buttons to push and you pushed them hard. It has all to do with me and how foolish I was to think I could change someone like you. There is no changing someone who is as cold and unfeeling as you. Someone who truly cares of no one but themselves. I can honestly say I hate you more then I have ever loved you. Maybe I never really loved you. Perhaps it was a simple infatuation that turned into a complete disaster. You were my drug and I was addicted. How cliche but there is no other way to describe how we were. You were the one who held me by a string. Well this time the string is broken. You left and this time I'll make sure you don't come crawling back. I won't let you come into my life again. I'm already broken I don't need you to break me more.
September 23, 2010