This Time From Before

August 14, 2010
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The reality is harsh but we march thinking we can begin our life together..

Though that reality is gone and only your love is what lasted..

Mine was strong but mine was also betrayed..

I am not sure what i can do but try and linger in your life..

With me as a puppet..

A hollowed self of my former being..

Joy and happiness dealt into hate and sorrow..

So I try and wallow in my own pity ..

But that means I must sacrifice my one sane thought..

I am my own being and will make decisions based on my feelings..

Though I think they are swallowed by the fact that I don't want to bring you pain..

I am trying and I am doing my best to sow this connection back up..

Though it may be too severed..

I am not quite sure..

I want and wanted you in my life but not sure how now..

I do love you still but its torn and hurt..

They say the greatest love can still crumble..

If one isn't true to themselves..

I am trying to be true and its a hard journey..

I am not sure where these wings will bring me back to..

But I can only hope to that one time..

I am no puppet and I am no puppy..

I will do what is best for me in the end..

I only hope that it doesn't cause too much pain..

If reality remains distorted.........

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