You don't know me.

August 29, 2010
Did you know

Of the different ways I hide insecurity?

How I tend to cry

Myself to sleep every night?

How I stand my ground

But brace myself for getting pushed down?

How easily I can fake a laugh

Then turn around and want to fall apart?

And how I sometimes do

And it costs me more than I'll ever have?

How I tend to lose my mind

And deal with the pain in the worst of ways?

How each day I live a lie

Hide this f***ed up place I'm supposed to call a home?

What goes on behind closed doors

How I scream until I can't breathe anymore?

How I make the same mistakes

Hour after hour, every f*****g day?

Why I even write all this s*** down

Because I'm too afraid to even open up my mouth?

How I let the pain release

Thinking, no one knows what it's like to be me?

How once I thought of suicide

But never had the guts to actually do it?

How I always tell myself I'm better than that

But still live on in a present my past has ruined?

How a hidden depression resides in me

And I'm playing a game I know I won't win?

You think you have a right?

To say I'm useless and have no friends or life?

Did you know all of these things?

Before you went on and judged me?

No you didn't.

So let me live this messed up life the way it should be.

Thanks to you

You made all faith in that die.

You don't know me

So stop pretending you do.

Stop being one more problem in this f***** up life.

Honestly, it's the least you could do.

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