July 3, 2010
Have you ever felt
like you needed to know
someone but couldn’t?
Have you ever felt
like you’ve been abandoned?
Like a piece of you
is missing
because that piece is
inside someone else?
I’ve felt this and still do.
I’ve grown up my entire life
without my real mom.
Yes I have a step mom
who I love very much
but sometimes I wonder about my real mom.
I wonder what she’s like.
What she looks like.
How she is.
If she’s nice or mean.
But I don’t know.
I’d ask my dad but I’m afraid.
I’m afraid
he would think that I don’t love my step mom.
Which I do.
She’s just like m real mom to me.
But still I’d like my questions to be answered.
But I can’t ask them.
I don’t want to hurt her feelings
or have to have him bring up
a subject he wouldn’t want to talk about.
I’ve found my adoption certificates
and found out some things about her.
But its not enough.
My curiosity grows everyday.
Sometimes I feel like crying
just because she’s not here.
I know she left me but still.
I can’t help it.
I miss her
but don’t want anyone else to know
because I don’t want to hurt them.

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