My nightmare arrived with open jaws
A hungry guest
To swallow me into her inky dark depths
And digest

Night after night, she tore through my dreams
Teasing with terror
Trapping me
With no way out.

No way out but in.

So, into the black cavern I went
Light and Hope faltered
In the most dismal darkness
Fear's hand was the only hand I had to hold.

I walked with fear until i came upon a golden glow
And heard a youthful ruckus, festivities in sight.
The dream was my own, but I felt as a leper might--
Invisible, and not quite right.


The 'beautiful' party girls clumped together
Like the bad mascara she's wearing this evening
These 'pretty' girls I couldnt find attractive.
Beady-eyed crows peering down their beaks at you
What with the way they stared, and stared
as if trying to tell you something through their decorated eyes
But I didn't need an animal whisperer to get the message
"Never in your wildest dreams, could you be like me"
And again I remained unnoticed, like the death of a moment.
Even in my wildest dream.

What was their secret?
It continued to elude me
Something on the tip of my toungue, and just out of reach
Like the meaning of words in a language you can't speak
Lost as the shreds of truth in an overused excuse

Maybe it's me.
Take away everything that's me
Make me...
Un-me?
The rest is done. I already am
Un popular
un-talented
un-beautiful
Unknown

I wanted to cry out
To beg on my knees, and plead
And ask the purpose for such a mystery.
But I still had my pride
Just barely.

Do you feel lucky? Asked a voice seated on my shoulder
No, I actually didnt.
But frustration can drive a woman mad, said my soul to my mind
So I stood, and I spoke.
"I am me, and just as good"

Quiet overcame the room
air heavy with unsaid thoughts
like the scream of a muted guitar string
And it was silent.
Silence of the shocked crowd
an audience slapped with surprise
I, the outcast, dared to rise
And stole the show before their eyes.