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Crazy

I will never be successful
Never get through all of this
If life is just so awful
Why do people keep living?

When I get like this
When I wish that I’d die
I cannot see the reason
For me to keep going

I cannot see through this storm
Of papers and deadlines and never being smart enough
To do it right. Never having the ability
To be the way I once was

Smart and ambitious is how I used to be
I wanted it so badly didn’t even need to try
But then I stopped caring, something brought me down
And now I can’t seem to find reason or motivation

It all seems so useless
This torture that I live
I can’t even keep my head straight
In these early morning hours

So I cry, wasting time
Screaming without making a noise
My jaw just forced as wide as it can be
But no sound escapes my lips

It’s all a waste of time
That’s what I think I am
I’m just always in the way
Can’t do things the right way

And there it is again
That throbbing hole
Where my motivation used to be
Telling me to just be useless or die

Who really cares?
I know this is all wrong
But how can I learn to right these ways
And move on in my life?

It’s so early, I’m so crazy
I can’t even tell you where I’m going with this
I just needed it out
And it just kept going





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