Humpty Dumpty, cool as can be, enjoyed his iced tea as he sat on the wall.
It was perfect outside
a calm 65 degrees with a nice little breeze.
Nothing can ruin this moment thought Humpty
until he saw an annoying old acquaintance fly up to a near tree.
There was a terrible grudge between these two, a fiery hatred.
Just the sight of Kirby, the irritating bird, made Humpty's very yolk boil.
And Kirby began.
The chirps and the tweets and the infuriating peeps.
Humpty couldn't stand it.

My God!
That has to be the most frustrating animal in all of the world.
I can't take it much longer. I'm gonna burst with anger.
My perfect day just ruined entirely.
I hate that bird!

Humpty Dumpty looked around for a rock
but only could find his still-full can of Arizona tea.
Without thinking
Humpty heaved the heavy can and aimed right for Kirby's face.
But Humpty lost his balance mid-throw and fell back off the great wall and onto his shell.
What a disaster and, to top it all off,
the sound of a jerk chirping and tweeting and peeping in laughter
rang loudly in Humpty's cracked head.
And Humpty knew not that soon all the king's horses and all the king's men
would have to put Humpty back together again.