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Valentines Day

Is it too much to want
to be loved on Valentines Day?
Is it desperate to not care
By whom?
All around me I have friends who are happier than they've ever been -
Am I a terrible person for wanting to snatch it away
so they'd remember how it is to be alone?
Here in the desolate darkness,
The flashes of genuine bliss reflected on their faces
Shine and taunt me.
I try to push your from my mind
So my spirits aren't' wrenched down
By the way you let me down.
Words weren't used (or needed)
To reveal your (lack of) feelings for me -
Your averted gaze said it all.

You're not doing me any favors
By acting like you care how I feel.
Forced smiles that freeze my hopeful heart
Leave me speechless and depressed when I realize their insincerity.
I'm not your dog -
Stop throwing me bones.

Fantasies have long since
Stopped flowing through my mind,
And are replaced with questions of why.
Why aren't I good enough?
Why doesn't anyone care?
I try to be angry with you
For not returning the feelings I'm assaulted with -
But then you say something to make me laugh
And all that resentment fades away.

Why do I always fall head-first
For the guys who are only good
For making me cry?
In my head I know
Theres no way you feel the same way,
But my heart won't take no for an answer.
I'm vying for your attention,
Hating myself all the while.



Join the Discussion

This article has 9 comments. Post your own now!

QuixoticDreamer said...
Aug. 26, 2010 at 5:36 pm

"I'm not your dog-

Stop throwing me bones."

I can't help but like these lines, even if they are bitter. They are strong and creative, and get the point across without being long-winded.

 
GangstaEyes This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Aug. 26, 2010 at 6:16 pm
Yeeeah :) Thank you.
 
WritingLoverForever said...
Aug. 9, 2010 at 10:34 pm
Love is bittersweet.  Sometimes it's the most beautiful thing in the world, and sometimes the most depressing thing in the world. And you explained that really well.  Nice job. :)
 
GangstaEyes This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Aug. 13, 2010 at 10:02 am
Exactly. :) Thanks for the comment!
 
OffMyRocker... said...
Aug. 9, 2010 at 4:38 pm
I like your use of words. This is easy to relate to and very well written.
 
GangstaEyes This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Aug. 13, 2010 at 10:02 am
Gracias! I really appreciate the feedback!
 
Rain777 said...
Jul. 11, 2010 at 2:14 pm

it reminds me of Last Valentines day. :? ahh it sucked haha!

God is Great! Things get better! This iv learned. :))

 
olican16 said...
Jul. 9, 2010 at 12:50 pm
This is very touching!! i love alll of your stuff!!!!!! keep up the good work!
 
ellyn-bo-bellyn_2014 said...
Jul. 1, 2010 at 5:44 pm
I was there when you were writing this. I know the story as well. I feel in the loop... Love your work!
 
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