My Day Job

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Beep beep beep
That is the noise I hear when I come in to the store.
It Irritates the crap out of me.
Can you please tell me where the salt is?
I stop and ask the customer to repeat herself,
Beep, beep… beep.
I said, can you please tell me where the salt is mam?
I tell the lady to go to aisle five and walk away.
My boss starts walking towards me.
She opens her mouth.
Beep beep beep.
I saiy “Sorry boss” and ask her to repeat herself.
She asks if I can stay till 10.
I nod my head and punch the clock.
Beep beep beep.
She tells me to relieve Dave on aisle one.
I hate aisle one.
I start walking to where that awful noise is coming from.
Beep beep beep.
I say ”Goodbye, Dave, lucky you get to go home”
He nods and I sign in. I stand there watching him go.
Crap, my first customer. She opens her mouth
Beep beep beep
I say, “Sorry mam can you repeat what you said?”
Here’s my preferred card, and I would like paper.
I hate paper; it takes longer to bag ,plus it’s raining.
Beep
I start scanning . Beep, Beep.
A bagger comes up to me and I’m glad because I need help.
He stands there and stares.
I start bagging myself which is good because it delays that sound.
The bagger opens his mouth but all I hear is
Beep beep beep
And I ask him to repeat himself and he says,
“How am I supposed to bag with no bags?”
I toss a stack of them to him and start scanning again.
The order is done and she walks away.
Beep Beep Beep.
The noise is coming from behind me and even farther away.
Even when I’m not scanning the noise is everywhere.
And when I get off work and go to bed all I hear in my head is
Beep



beep







beep.





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