The forever war

I never thought
I'd see my friend
Swallowed
By this war.
His bones slowly
Crushed
Under a thousand-ton weight,
The weight of the world.
His being picked apart
By the demons
Surrounding him.
Friends become sworn enemies,
Enemies become friends.
And so it is,
Since the beginning
Of civilization
With no end
In
Sight.





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Writer_Jordan said...
Mar. 20, 2012 at 6:05 pm
What a brilliant description. It can also be a metaphor to modern society! I loved it!
 
IamtheshyStargirl replied...
Mar. 23, 2012 at 9:42 pm
Thank you so very much for your kind comments, Jordan :)
 
leafy This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Oct. 19, 2011 at 9:24 am
Whoa, I totally love this! Like, it transcends through time, with real wars, or even "wars" in school. Very nice, I'm totally favoriting this ^_^
 
IamtheshyStargirl replied...
Oct. 20, 2011 at 4:28 pm

Awww, thanks ^.^ I don't think anyone's ever favorited my work, well, besides Raven. No one else has told me they did, at the very least. 

If you want to know the story behind this, you can find it somewhere near the bottom of the comments :)

 
leafy This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Oct. 23, 2011 at 7:00 pm
No, thank you for writing this ^_^
 
IamtheshyStargirl replied...
Dec. 2, 2011 at 10:09 pm

That's so sweet of you, Leafy :) I really appreciate that.

(Sorry it took me so long to get to this.)

 
-leafy- This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Dec. 21, 2011 at 3:43 pm
Don't thank me for liking this, I thank you for writing it. You certainly have a way with words.
 
IamtheshyStargirl replied...
Mar. 23, 2012 at 9:42 pm

(Sorry it took me so long to get back to this) 

You are too kind, my dearrest Leafy :)

 
YellowRose79 said...
Jul. 14, 2011 at 4:01 pm
Cool story behind it. I like the way it has the feeling that it doesn't really end. (Sorry if that doesn't make sense...)
 
IamtheshyStargirl replied...
Jul. 14, 2011 at 4:07 pm

Haha, that totally makes sense :)

(I'm so glad you commented on this one in particular!)

 
Aderes18 said...
Jun. 9, 2011 at 2:37 pm

By the way, great poem. :)

My ELA teacher once told me that I have a gift with putting two or more ideas or messages into one poem. I think you have it too. :)

 
IamtheshyStargirl replied...
Jun. 13, 2011 at 3:46 pm
Wow, thanks :)
 
Aderes18 said...
Jun. 9, 2011 at 2:36 pm

Poem reflects your life. makes me feel like your life is sad, almost tragic.  You also seem to be obsessed with dreams. I am too. :)

I like anaylizing writing and thinking about what it shows in the writer's life. It's part of my obsession with psychology.

 
IamtheshyStargirl replied...
Jun. 13, 2011 at 3:48 pm

I am definitely obsessed with dreams :) I don't think my life's really tragic, deifinitely abnormal and a bit isolated, but not really tragic. I think I'm a bit melodramatic at times :)

You like schycology? Coolness :)

 
Aderes18 replied...
Jun. 16, 2011 at 7:35 am

I think what you said about your life...applies to me too. :)

I'm melodramatic as well.

Yeah, I'm thinking of being a scychologist when I grow up. :)

 
IamtheshyStargirl replied...
Jun. 16, 2011 at 8:34 pm
Cool :)         
 
IamtheshyStargirl replied...
Jul. 14, 2011 at 4:08 pm
(I can't spell.)
 
IamtheStargirl said...
Sept. 21, 2010 at 5:48 pm

I will always love this poem :)

It was my first truly great piece.

 
TheGoldenDomination said...
Aug. 20, 2010 at 2:40 pm

This was a really great poem and the story behind it is cool :)

anyways i really loved it :)

 
IamtheStargirl replied...
Aug. 20, 2010 at 2:48 pm

Thank you; it was my first really great poem since I started writing poetry. I used to always try to rhyme, and the end results were really stiff sounding.

It took this poem to help me realize that rhyme doesn't always make a poem, it's the flow and imagery,

 
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