Forgotten

April 27, 2010
By Forgotten BRONZE, Aurora, Colorado
Forgotten BRONZE, Aurora, Colorado
3 articles 0 photos 20 comments

Favorite Quote:
Loneliness adds beauty to life. It puts a special burn on sunsets and makes night air smell better.-Henry Rollins, For who can bear to feel himself forgotten?-W. H. Auden, Forgotten is forgiven- F. Scott Fitzgerald


Tears roll down my cheeks.
But I don’t think that anyone has seen them.
I don’t think anyone cares.

For to the world, I’m nothing but a ghost.
A shadow.
A small breeze in the distance.

I don’t matter.
How could I?
No one has the time to actually see me with their eyes.
Or heard me with their ears.

I’m invisible, it seems.
Doomed to roam the earth unseen.
Cursed to remain as nothing but a distant memory in the human mind.
Destined to be nothing but the whisper on the wind whose cries are never registered.

Ignored by those who “care” for me.
Forgotten by “friends” and “family”.

Who am I to be who I am?
What gives me the right to wish to be something more?
Something important?
Something… remembered?

Apparently I don’t have the right
Because I don’t deserve to be noticed.



Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 5 comments.


on Jul. 4 2010 at 10:50 pm
Forgotten BRONZE, Aurora, Colorado
3 articles 0 photos 20 comments

Favorite Quote:
Loneliness adds beauty to life. It puts a special burn on sunsets and makes night air smell better.-Henry Rollins, For who can bear to feel himself forgotten?-W. H. Auden, Forgotten is forgiven- F. Scott Fitzgerald

i'll try that, thanks for the advice.

Thorn BRONZE said...
on Jul. 4 2010 at 10:21 pm
Thorn BRONZE, Baltimore, Maryland
1 article 0 photos 100 comments
This was good. the flow was decent, the structure confused me, and I think it does need to be a bit more descriptive. Different word choice. Like instead of people don't see me, you can use words like blind or oblivious. Overall, nice job!

on Jun. 5 2010 at 4:50 pm
GoodmorningSweetheart BRONZE, Bloomington, Indiana
2 articles 0 photos 16 comments

Favorite Quote:
From Thomas the Rhymer:
"O see ye not that narrow road,
So thick beset with thorns and briers?
That is the path of righteousness,
Tho after it but few enquires."

I just realize that there's a typo. -.- I hate it when I do this.

* thoughts that


on Jun. 4 2010 at 5:29 pm
Forgotten BRONZE, Aurora, Colorado
3 articles 0 photos 20 comments

Favorite Quote:
Loneliness adds beauty to life. It puts a special burn on sunsets and makes night air smell better.-Henry Rollins, For who can bear to feel himself forgotten?-W. H. Auden, Forgotten is forgiven- F. Scott Fitzgerald

thank you.

on Jun. 4 2010 at 12:22 pm
GoodmorningSweetheart BRONZE, Bloomington, Indiana
2 articles 0 photos 16 comments

Favorite Quote:
From Thomas the Rhymer:
"O see ye not that narrow road,
So thick beset with thorns and briers?
That is the path of righteousness,
Tho after it but few enquires."

Forgotten, I find it very difficult to critique poems because they are a reflection of ourselves on a deep and meaningful level.

However, I could suggest something for this poem: more description.

This poem is about emotion; thoughts the writhe in your head. I would like to feel the twisted pain, the overflowing sorrow, and maybe the bitterness of being forgotten.

But really, this poem does not require an excess of description. It is meaningful enough without it.



SciArc

MacMillan Books

Aspiring Writer? Take Our Online Course!