Lies, insults, rumors, all these things fly around me.
How can they hurt me?
You have no idea,
these things dwell inside my head and constantly repeat themselves.
These words feel like a complete beat down.
Day in, day out they run through my mind and repeatedly put me down.
What am I to do?
I know I’m better than they say………aren’t I?
It took me almost all of my life to find somewhere that I’m equal
and find friends to make me see that I am better than they say and find self-respect.
But these physical words make it seem like peace will never be.
What do I have to do?
What do I have to prove?
What do I have to become?
Apparently love is a four letter word that is never spoken here.
Here in this prison,
I’m interrogated by my own mind.
I don’t know what to do.
I’ve searched my heart for the answers,
but confusion prevents me from going any farther.
I want to look intimidating but evidently it just makes me look like a joke.
These hopes and dreams I guess will never come to be.
No, but one day I’ll splatter color on this gray.
I will have my time, but until then I just crawl into myself, hide in myself
and await judgment day.