Nightmares

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I love an incubus;
He pretends to know
Literature, art, philosophy,
Medicine.
When I disappear
There are no mountains,
No shaggy trees or
Silver water that
Rip into my mouth.

I'm not allowed to
Taste time;
If I exist without time
Do I exist at all?

My words are my bread,
My thoughts are water,
And when strung together
I feast.
In the darkness I barely make out
Ladybugs with hardened shells,
Knives wrapped in blankets.
I pray he doesn't see them.

He knows.

He smiles.

I admit he was right;
The beatings and rapes
Have stripped me away,
And in my place I
Have become everything
All at once.
I have decided to
Originate the future,
Shrug out of my skin
In favour of screaming light.

The water keeps rising.
I'm going to drown.
I'm going to live.
So many faces pressed against
The glass, eyes asking me
To save them.

Water creeping up the staircase,
Flooding the basement,
Their lungs, their sockets.
I turn and run.
He says it's alright.
Deep breaths. Deep breaths.

This is the beginning;
This is the long way down.





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