The Hard Life

April 17, 2010
By Anonymous

Day by day, Night by night
I'd weep myself to sleep
Dream applications of worried thoughts,
of having no food to eat
Didn't think my feet would tarry,
throughout the Dark- Hearted Days
The voices of arguing and shrieking,
never thought it would ever end
Asking God, Why do these things have to happen?
Just wishes of living the good life,
with all the fame and money,
but it never turned out that way

Bread is the biggest issue,
not having enough was the problem
Needs of clothes, shoes, and supplies
Asking neighbors or wearing hand-me-downs
May be too tight,
or may not fit because it was too small,
Sometimes too short or even uncomfortable,
but I guess I was blessed

At school, I hid the pain and aggression inside
Walking tall and arrogant within the frigid halls,
Laughing my way through the fake,
but as soon as I left school and walked into that front door
Smiles turned into slow burns,
Happiness turned into layers of sadness, like onions do
And for all you know, all integrity was lost

The feelings of hate started to climb,
step by step, as I climbed the steps of anguish
One by one, buh-boomp, buh- boomp,
heart pounding faster and faster
I could hear him looming down the hall,
like the sound of the Moloch breathing
As he approached us with his scowl and grimace,
demanding submission through terror

One by one, we marched to the kitchen with his sledgehammer will
As he enters the kitchen doorway,
like a lion peering at the lioness kill
There, the hungry eyes with insationable appetites, looking like hyenas,
waiting to feast on what the carcass of the lions waste was
The tummy rumbles from hungers malady,
meager meals, suffice for now,
like Tylenol does with those with brain tumors
Our meal is done now

Going down the stairs, feeling like Dante,
going down the inferno into the bowels of hell
Forcing us to rub his feet, as if an Angel would rub Lucifer's hooves
Not hard enough! his voice would bellow, “Too hard!”
Thud! His hand coming down on our backs,
echoing the whips cracking on my ancestor's backs
But I would not be broken,
the powers that be, over the powers of my being
My tears were my blood,
my body was my chariot
And this was just another battle for the war within,
the devil's den

And then, the late night, Twilight, would come
Eyes drawn heavy and our hands, swollen and sore
Cries of agony and despair, as every minute passed
Tick- Tock, Tick- Tock, Tick- Tock
Trying to sneak away from the plantation,
but as soon as I start to sneak, he yells,
"Did I tell you that you were done, Finish your duty!"
I understand we all have our fields to plow
And I now, have an Ox now
I'm finished, my heart pounds

He screams and shouts, as I disregard his voice
Swiftly moving to my room, my eyes swell
Laying my head onto my pillow, trying to block out the loud noises
The shrieks, the cries, His loathing voice
Praying, God please help me sleep tonight
I lay my heart to rest, for the next commanding day to come
A recycled blend
Day by Day, Night by Night
I'd weep myself to sleep

The author's comments:
this poem was about my old life and how I challenged this outcome with my sister's and brother

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