April 12, 2010
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It's raining again, a soft
trickling shower, the droplets
drumming their little fingers
along the windowpane,
scratching at the surface,
streaking down the glass
like the wasted tears
I wept that day.
Oh, how far away it seems,
that day on which I
dissolved with the rain.
But, still, I relive it
all in vivid recollection.
Heart spinning, mind screaming,
begging for an escape
from the memories that haunt me.

Donning my jacket,
ear buds blaring, I step out into
the mist. Death Cab For Cutie
fills the silence, splitting insanity,
guiding me in song as I veer
toward the treeline.

Just like that day, when I arrived,
nostalgic, really. You left me alone,
upon the death angel's wing,
so I came here looking in vain.
I did not find you there,
nor were you ever here.
I stood there for a long time,
idly humming to a tune---
Tiny Vessels invade my soul.
"Yeah, she was beautiful,
but she don't mean a thing to me."

Oh, why did you have to go?
I've lost myself amongst
the labyrinth of trees
which conceal the treasure
of my love, departed from me.
Where have you gone?

Ben Gibbard's voice wrenches
me from my stupor, and I
turn back, homeward bound,
and, just like on that day,
the tears flowing from
my eyes dissolve with the rain
as my memories become
children of the melancholy clouds.

"...I wanted to believe in all
the words that I was speaking
as we moved together in the dark
and all the friends that I was telling,
and all the playful misspellings,
and every bit I gave you left a mark..."

"...So one last touch, and then you'll go
and then we'll pretend that it was something so much more.
But it was vile, and it was cheap,
and you are beautiful, but you don't mean a thing to me.
Yeah, you are beautiful, but you don't mean a thing to me..."

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