My mirth is deep under the dirt

April 8, 2010
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mirth, contentment, happiness.
how does one acquire it?
why is it something i have yet to posses?
Despair: I'm so tired of it.

I live to make her proud,
so that she never disdains me.
I have always tried to keep my feet steady on the ground,
but the standards sometime drain me.

I live to make him stay calm,
so we have neither quarrels nor fights.
So that his smile is like the sun at dawn.
So our love always sparkles like starry nights.

I live to be her role model;
I try to exemplify the best.
So that she walks on a straight path, and never has a waddle.
So that she's better than the rest.

It's so hard to not break down under the stress....
to keep up with the expectations...
to always keep the love without a mess...
to get her on the road to the correct destination...

It's so hard to let them all down.
It's so hard to keep them all content.
But it's harder to keep me without the frown.
Can I please -- for myself -- just have one moment?

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