Visions of Fish

April 7, 2010
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Sitting in my room, I feel lonely and cramped.
My parents are nowhere to be found,
And my friends don’t come around anymore.
My boyfriend is a walking vegetable,
A burnout,
But who am I to judge?
I am no better.
I feel lazy and I don’t want to be here anymore.
One flick of the lighter and im off,
In another world.
My world is full of colors,
They swirl like neon fish that change shape.
But my world is flawed.
Full of hidden dangers.
The background is black, like my mood,
And the colors are bright against it.
As I begin to enjoy myself and relax,
Faces begin to emerge from the senseless shapes and colors.
They are the faces of my friends and family.
They begin to yell and nag at me.
I swat at them and they disappear into a cloud of multi- colored smoke.
But I can still see them,
They hang around the corners of my vision.
Their accusing stares unnerve me so I stamp out in the ashtray.
My room is filled with green tinged smoke,
But no one is here to smell it,
And they wont be for quit awhile.
With no thoughts or feelings left in me,
I lumber to the kitchen for a snack.

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