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A single piece of paper

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When I came there, thoughts of nothing on my mind
And a single piece of paper and words that made me smile.
And who knew that a single piece of paper could turn into-
And lunches beside a vending machine, and a look that implies-
And codes that I can’t figure out, but already know what it says
Even though I don’t want to believe it,
And then one day you say it. You say the words that-
And I know you mean it, and I trust you because I feel it too
Even though I won’t admit it, and a kiss-
And I walk away because what am I doing, and as my heart beats fast
I want to turn back and look but I walk straight and that class
I think about-
And I feel it grow and I try to stop it but it consumes me till
I think, even though I know, have for a while, that
I love you
And still I walk away leave you there to wait-
The day I knew would come, I pack up I leave and you weren’t there,
And I die-
And I know that you will forget me, and every day I long to be with you
To see you, to touch you like I did at lunch by a vending machine
And then a single email from someone I don’t know
And it’s you and you say K.T. and? And then as
I lay awake at night I know it’s you but it can’t be you because
I told you not to-
But I feel my heart beat like it used to because It has a reason to,
And then emails and words exchanged and she-
And you-
And I feel it break all over again and I don’t want to love you
I wish I could hate you because I don’t like to feel this pain
And over the miles I feel the cold metal, and I don’t want you to
Have my heart. But I –
And I think about you with her, how i used to imagine me… with you
And I can’t do it and I want to break the world, to burn it till I don’t hurt anymore
Because you promised and-
I thought you would be different, but-
And I should have known that I couldn’t trust anyone
That I shouldn’t fall in love
And I think of a single piece of paper, with words that made me smile
And I think of lunches by a vending machine
And a look that says –
And I know in my heart
That no matter what you do, no matter how much it hurts that
I’ll always be yours and I’ll always come back
Because you’re the only one that makes my heart-
I know that your the only person I will ever love
And maybe soon, but I can wait
If maybe you’ll wait to
But I can see you moving on because why would you wait?
Why would you still care about the girl that came and left
That left a lock without a key
But a key it has and the key you are because
You opened my heart and told me to love
And no matter what I will never regret that.
Even if you don’t… wait.





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rainlover1994 said...
Apr. 29, 2010 at 3:45 pm

I really like it. The rhythm of your poem has a way of perfectly expressing the confusion that love can drag along with it complete with guilt for ever feeling that way. But don't worry, confusion can't last forever even though I know when you are stuck in the middle of it you feel it has no end. 

I think you might enjoy some poems I wrote called Just one touch, and Time. You should check it out and please keep writing, you've got some skill and I feel it can be the ... (more »)

 
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