It seems like this happens a lot. Every time I make a decision something backfires. I’m tryna tell them that I’m no liar, but then again no one ever listens to the accused. Past actions are past actions and they can’t ever let it go. Seem like I don’t pay them any mind though, but one day there’s an argument…then you’re accused by another gesture. You shout out the truth and they still look for answers. Like how quick you could be killed by cancers. You assure them over and over, but they block you out making you feel smaller tha a speck of sand. Only to heal by your favorite rock band. It pisses me off and I shut down communication. Keeping my distance away from explosion with expulsion along with my deepest emotions. Being accused is like being in my jail cell. Locked away from the world hoping no buttons are pushed. Then the dead silence brings questions, just my luck. Accusations, keeping my lips locked like the missing key to my emotions. Bottling up inside hoping that patience isn’t tested. K Like a thunder storm behind closed doors as the sound blasted. Being accused does nothing but tear down relationships. Watching it flip up, down, around, and backwards. Just like the two-faced accuser who always stumbles forward. Of course it gets better over time I guess. I wouldn’t get used to it though. For it will start again, just as cold.
April 2, 2010