Jessica

I was your daughter
I’m all grown up now
I don’t even know who you are
You are not my mother, you just gave birth to me

My name is Jessica
That’s all you know about me
You gave me life, but you didn’t give me my name

This is my house
Where I have lived all my life
Where were you?

My name is Jessica
Does my name fit me?
A gift?
To my mother, my name means what it is
I am her gift from you
She is my mother, not you
She raised me, not you
You gave me life
But not an identity
I don’t even know my ethnicity
I had to figure that out
not knowing my own history

You look at me now
You see me with only a name attached
Am I as beautiful as you thought I would be?
A baby born that you didn’t see
Do I look like a Jessica?
Do I look like you?

I don’t know who I am
I can’t present myself to you
I don’t know my brothers
I don’t know my sisters
I don’t know my father
And I don’t know you
I don’t know about the diseases
I don’t know who died
I don’t know what blood runs through my veins
I don’t know my family’s name
I don’t know who I am
I don’t know who I belong to
But I don’t belong to you

All I have is this name
what I call myself when first introduced
to you, to you?

Jessica is a gift
A gift to behold
Let me introduce myself
The one child missing from your life
The child that could never call you mother





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