What is wrong with my family
y mother's flatulence
My aunt's cocaine addiction
Uncle Jack's third nipple
My brother's rash
And now my sister's ingrown toe nail.
How I feel ashamed to tell the tale
The worst of them all
When my sister fell from the jungle gym
And stubbed her little big toe
And how it swelled and swelled
To twice its size
It grew so much that it started to grow limbs
Feet
Arms
Hands
Toes
Even eyes and a mouth to squeal in horror
Every time my sister wore shoes.
She would have to go barefoot, in the snow,
To school.
And because of the monstrous toe
She lost her friends
But her family stayed put.
My mother made her beans every morning and the farting and sharting
Oh it relieved my sister's pain.
My uncle would tell her stories to cheer her up
As my aunt shot up cocaine to reduce the swelling.
My brother's rash medicine helped too
Although it smelled like stew.
We all helped her
Through this ordeal
As I moved out
Saying "Goodbye you freaks"
And closed the door.