I write with no purpose
Ambition or strength
I pray for God’s mercy
His love, at full length

Because I’m a sad imitation
Of the girl I should be
Lately I avoid mirrors
I detest what I see

My life should be perfect
I’ve got money and brains
But the addiction to freedom
Is like heroin in my veins

I want to give it up
I want to succeed
But it’s got me in knots
Pulling me to my knees

I don’t have the courage
The vigor or drive
To take myself off this path
And let my talents blossom and thrive

I hate who I am
But I loathe who I was
So where do I go now
To escape hell of my flaws

There’s nowhere to run to
No where to turn
My eyes, they keep shifting
With each new person, I learn

I can be preachy
A preachy preachy machine
But when the boring wins out
I can switch in a new dream

I can take hits
Like a speedballer can after years
But when they snort a line
They ain’t fighting back tears


I’ve torn up my family
My dad, he hates me
My sister’s indifferent
And my mother’s love fades quickly


So where do I run to
Tell me where do I hide
When what I’ve realized I’m running from
Is living, inside.