I Should Have Listened | Teen Ink

I Should Have Listened

March 4, 2010
By Anonymous

I was stupid
He was stupid
Together we could have stopped this
9 months of misery
Plus 18 years more
Pregnant at 15
The times I walked away
My mom tried to tell me
“You can avoid it”
Rumors, stares, nausea
Why me?

I thought it couldn’t happen to me
No way
No how
Just one night changed that
Changed my high school career
Changed my life
And my birthday night
It was my special surprise
And a big surprise it turned out to be

I should have told him no
But we loved each other
I owed it to him
At least I thought so
I know he did

I was a good girl
Good grades
Good family
Good values
My close friends turned their backs and contributed more dirty looks
Bye-bye 3.9 GPA
Bye-bye college
Bye-bye social life

At least I had my boyfriend
He was my one true love
My best friend
My only friend
Now
He was there
Every time
I needed him
Until he got bored
And said he didn’t love me anymore
So much for forever and always
So I vented to my Mac Book

Status: Single
Mood: Broken );

Tears, and neglect
This couldn’t be happening to me
Not me
No way
No how

This morning was worse than any so far
Sickness, sadness, sorrow
I don’t even like kids
I’ve never babysat
I’ve never changed a diaper
And I’m not social anymore

My family is here for me
But I need my friends to talk to
Nothing is the same
Nothing will ever be the same

Two years later and I’m struggling to get by
I dropped out of school
I don’t have a job
And I sit around all day and make my parents take care of my son
Now, I vent to my drug addiction
It is the only thing that takes the pain away anymore

My son is going to be taken away
He is my life and I wish I would stop blaming everyone else for my faults
But I don’t want live like this

My 14-year-old sister just announced that she is pregnant
It seems that I have started a tradition
Mom,
I’m sorry
I should have listened


The author's comments:
Seeing teens in my High School have babies at such a young age really inspired me to put myself in their shoes and tell about all the things that would be going through my very own head.

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