Woman who is not a woman

February 24, 2010
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She sits
hunched over,
keeled over
in her seat

Her head hangs limply
on her broken
shaken knees.

she is small
and broken
but the stench is wide
and strong

her hair is dyed blonde
under a baseball cap
and over urine stained jeans
that lead
to the puddle of p--- at her feet

and we all stay away
for fear of catching her disease
no one's at ease
and as faces contort they resort
to moving to the other side of the train

Yet this is not just a drunk
an addict
a w----
who was too high or too low or too poor
to wait for the bathroom

this is a woman
was a woman
who is a child
who was a child

was a woman
is no longer a woman
because when they took her money
her house
her smack
her kids
they took that too

Stripped of womanhood
stripped of humanity
stripped of right to be happy
coasting life on the next high
because really,
this girl needs it to get by

and she is but a shell
and when she looks in the mirror
she sees pieces of the woman
she sees pieces of the woman
she sees pieces of the woman she used to be
longs to be
hopes to be

but today life took that away from her too
and she sat in a puddle of her own p---
too high and too low
to miss what it was like to feel
too high and too low to miss
who she was and who she will never be
but a memory in my mind

and i tell myself
never be like her
never be like her
never be the woman who is not a woman
never let life beat you until your soul is so broken
that your body starts breaking too

I screamed to myself
never give in to this
never succumb to the pleasures
of this pleasureless life

I scream i scream i scream
Never be the woman who is no longer a woman.

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