what do you see

February 27, 2010
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what do you see when you look at me?
do you see the morning sunrise or just a girl you simply despise. How can you look at me after the pain you've caused. my heart is shattered and detached, thrown aside like a piece of worthless trash. when you look at me do you see the self esteem that you have cut down. telling me i am not good enough and pushing as i begged you to stop. when you look at me do you see my wounds, the wounds you caused still fresh and burning. when you look at me i bet you cant see anything, i hide it because i have to, any sign of weakness and i am dead to you. i have to be something i am not, who i was before you i completely forgot. Bruised and battered, i hate myself, hate with a passion everlasting because i let you control me. when you look at me i bet you feel ashamed, ashamed of what you created. Lead down a dark path blinded by beauty but i failed to do was look within you. so when i look at you i see, a reflection of a heartless demon who is unrelentless, eating at the souls of the innocent never stopping to realize the pain and destruction you cause. So when you look at me i hope you can finally see i am way stronger than you think.

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thecrystalbudz said...
Aug. 30, 2010 at 12:03 am
I can relate to this a lot. It makes me want to show my ex that I can accomplish anything and that everything that happened between him and I made me stronger and whatever he does to try to ruin me, I can't be broken down.
MercedesXO said...
Aug. 1, 2010 at 7:50 pm
i love this!! it reminds me of my life. it was like you literally took my thoughts and put them into words:) thank you so much for this. it is so truthful and..real. it reminds me of my relationship with my mother..sad, but true. anyways, great job!
musiclover71 said...
Jul. 7, 2010 at 5:51 pm
this is so amazing. you are a great writer
Lonleydandy said...
Jul. 4, 2010 at 9:07 pm
It's wonderful! I understand the meaning so fully, which makes it all the better for reading :)
christin.bass replied...
Jul. 6, 2010 at 5:57 pm
Thank you so much! i really appreaciate it. (:
the.kanguru This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Apr. 11, 2010 at 5:17 pm
the message is very clear and the description/rhyme scheme are good, but the complete lack of punctuation except periods was a bit detrimental to the overall quality of the poem, especially when there would normally be question marks (it can be a little bit stilted).
christin.bass replied...
Jul. 6, 2010 at 5:58 pm
Yeah i noticed after i published it. That i missed a few commas, thanks for the constructive critisim though, i'll pay attention more next time.
mysteries58 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Mar. 26, 2010 at 9:54 am
I love your use of amazing adjectives! The poem is also well developed...a clearer use of punctuation may help the reader, but overall, nice job. :)
christin.bass replied...
Jul. 6, 2010 at 5:58 pm
Thank you soo much (:
Powd3er said...
Mar. 5, 2010 at 11:19 am
This poem has great flow and insight.
I really enjoyed it.
Lovely poem darling =]
-Please check out the works that I have posted on here it would be highly appreciated and I think you would greatly enjoy them, Thankk youz-
XxIll tell you Im an orphan after you meet myy familyXx
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