Valentine's Night

February 19, 2010
“i love you”
the young man offers weakly yet sincerely
she knows not how to acknowledge this affection

seamlessly she recalls her encounters with love
the confrontations were few and far between
and the only love she truly desired

was completely unavailable to her
the one commodity she wished whole heartedly to ascertain
she simply couldn’t grasp

the simple affection she so longed for, came from the father she was denied of
her infantile attempts to emphasize her talents to him
simply went unnoticed

his absence fueled her seemingly perpetuating inadequacies.
his nonchalance substantiated every doubt
his unsupportive nature fed her uncertainty

verbally he tattooed her, informing her that she was
incomplete and unsatisfactory
she locked these nullifications deep within herself

he’d eroded her ability to secure hope in the fact
the she could possibly be resplendent in any capacity
to anyone

she’d longed
everyday of her existence to finally to know what unfiltered, perfect
adoration felt like

however, in her quest to find unblemished affection
she had trained herself, in spite of herself to distrust
even the slightest traces of tenderness and devotion

and there she was on the bridge
standing between the broken girl
and the woman who wanted nothing more than to finally be whole

but because pain is commonplace
and she can’t tolerate nonsensical emotion
she answers the vulnerable youth

protecting the obliterated girl she still is
she responds
“no you don’t”

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