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Entrancing Darkness (Second Version)

February 1, 2010
By SilverLuna SILVER, _________, Washington
More by this author
SilverLuna SILVER, _________, Washington
8 articles 0 photos 229 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Come fairies take me out of this dull world, for I would ride with you upon the wind and dance upon the mountains like a flame.".... W.B. Yeats.
"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss." - Douglas Adams

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I am the balance of light and dark,
While I am still that of soot and coal.
The coal deeply crimson in it’s black,
The soot ever present upon my back.
The light inside me shines dim,
Yet bright, though I try to hide it away from sight.
I am darkness,
But I am filling with small light.
Though it may be bright,
I’ll quash it with heinous delight.
I’ll snicker when the flame is finally extinguished,
Though I had wished it would put up a fight.
The coal paints me,
It dyes me black.
The soot as fine as sand,
Could never change me back.
Though I would never have it,
Losing my base for attack.
I do sincerely wish,
That the light has fought back.

© David D., Apple Valley, MN

The author's comments:
This is the second version of what in a sense was the same moment of inspiration. Reading between the two you can see the obvious similarities but I would like to know, for one: Which one do you think is better or if you like them both. And two: Whether i should combine these into one whole singular poem. Comments I love--via Yoda--so please leave many!
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 6 comments.

SilverLuna SILVER said...
on Sep. 27 2010 at 2:03 pm
SilverLuna SILVER, _________, Washington
8 articles 0 photos 229 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Come fairies take me out of this dull world, for I would ride with you upon the wind and dance upon the mountains like a flame.".... W.B. Yeats.
"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss." - Douglas Adams

View profile
Haha, thanks so much! This was one of my darker moments but I still love it anyways! Always write no matter what!
Kittycorn_of_Dolphinia SILVER said...
on Sep. 25 2010 at 8:49 pm
Kittycorn_of_Dolphinia SILVER, Miamisburg, Ohio
7 articles 0 photos 41 comments
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Ok first I have to say I love Yoda! ok now on a more serious note I liked this one a lot better and they should definitely stay separated.
SilverLuna SILVER said...
on May. 10 2010 at 9:49 am
SilverLuna SILVER, _________, Washington
8 articles 0 photos 229 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Come fairies take me out of this dull world, for I would ride with you upon the wind and dance upon the mountains like a flame.".... W.B. Yeats.
"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss." - Douglas Adams

View profile
Thanks! And the way I think of it, when it comes to my writing, though I might try to lead the readers in a certain direction, whatever they take from it is what it is to them. I love your perspective on it and I'll be sure to check out some of your work!(:
christian.e SILVER said...
on May. 5 2010 at 11:36 pm
christian.e SILVER, Dutch Harbor, Alaska
9 articles 0 photos 37 comments

Favorite Quote:
The eternal silence of these infinite spaces frightens me --Pascal

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I love it, it seems like it has a deeper meaning. And its so wonderful.

It sounds like the inner you the person you wish to be is comming out but like you have accepted the person you acctually are so it cant, but you stil wish it would. Or maybe its something totally different, idk my perspective on what it means.

Check out some of my stuff, i dont have a lot though.

MissFaber SILVER said...
on Mar. 22 2010 at 11:38 am
MissFaber SILVER, Wayne, New Jersey
5 articles 0 photos 156 comments

Favorite Quote:
Nothing Less.

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This sounds like it's coming from a seriously confused villain. It's funny and unique ;)
sydelle PLATINUM said...
on Feb. 22 2010 at 12:49 pm
sydelle PLATINUM, Estacada, Oregon
26 articles 0 photos 16 comments

Favorite Quote:
"And I fear not what man can do; for perfect love casteth out all fear..."

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Wow, this version is even better than the first... It has more rhythm, and a "beat" to it. Two thumbs way, wayyyy up! =D