Running Too Fast

January 24, 2010
By Marigold BRONZE, Oakville, Other
Marigold BRONZE, Oakville, Other
3 articles 0 photos 5 comments

I saw him and ran
Pulse pumping, blood in my brains








It was steep








But what did I care?


I was right there,




My vantage point up on the crest, showed him to me,

HE

thought he was being quiet, camouflaged by grey lumberjack print

So I ran
Sticks. Scree. Trees.
Down,
down,
down.
Then I was going too fast, legs







MADE

to move faster than I meant
And I faltered, I choose to look at his face
It was concerned, reaching out to me
The blur was slow now, too slow
My internal glasses showed






ME

an obstacle,
Too late. I hit it and,






FLY.

Flying is funny, you know you will land, but for that second in the air,
You believe it won’t hurt a bit.
(And it didn’t.)

LODOB. OOLBD. BLDOO. LODBO. BLOOD.

D
R
I
P
S



Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 3 comments.


on Feb. 17 2010 at 12:44 pm
Marigold BRONZE, Oakville, Other
3 articles 0 photos 5 comments
Constructive advice, thanks!

on Feb. 17 2010 at 9:11 am
TheBerkeleyBear BRONZE, Los Altos, California
3 articles 0 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow."

cute poem otherwise

on Feb. 17 2010 at 9:11 am
TheBerkeleyBear BRONZE, Los Altos, California
3 articles 0 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow."

It would've been nicer as a ballad. Besides that, the spacing ruined the rhythm. Also, the semi secret message was way to obvious with the spacing and lack of meaning with the rest of the line. You should've just CAPS the first word of every stanza, that would've been nice.


SciArc

MacMillan Books

Aspiring Writer? Take Our Online Course!