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One Step This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.

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This dream
of mine

It's so
defined

As if it's painted on my hand
a map of uncharted lands …

But the
first step

It's what
has kept

Me away

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.






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ImJustAGuy said...
Mar. 26, 2012 at 12:28 am
this is great and i can relate so much too it!  keep up the lovely writing!  pleaseee check out some of my work, im a new and upcoming poet !
 
Midnight_Hum This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 6, 2012 at 10:47 am
This is very good. Haha! This is kinda random, me viewing this, but I was rereading the comments on one of the articles of mine and saw yours. So I decided to check this out. I love how you give a sense of inner thoughts with this piece as well as a consideration for the future. The poem is somewhat whimsical and nostalgic but ultimately hopeful. I loved it. (Incidentally, this will probably be my last comment ever on Teen Ink)
 
AsIAm This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Sept. 23, 2010 at 8:48 am

The Good:  This is fun and upbeat and unique.  Great job!

The Bad: Don't see anything!

The Random: Once again, love your spacing.

 
MayaElyashiv This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Sept. 23, 2010 at 9:46 am
Thank you!!! 
 
Layton said...
Jun. 22, 2010 at 4:14 pm
This is so awesome and unique! Love it!
 
MayaElyashiv This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jun. 22, 2010 at 11:11 pm
Thanks!   
 
Fayrouz This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jun. 4, 2010 at 12:10 pm
so true! your poem is very universal, everyone can relate to it whether they want to climb a mountain or go across the monkey bars for the first time. the way you break up the lines is relaxing and lets me read it correctly and the rhyme is subtle and it doesn't get in the way. i don't like overly-rhyming poems (i think they sound kind of pathetic if they're not good if ya know what i mean) good job and keep writing!
 
MayaElyashiv This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jun. 5, 2010 at 4:35 am
Thanks for the great feedback! Over rhyming is a pet peeve for me too, but that doesn't mean I don't fall into its trap once and a while... I'm glad you liked the poem!
 
JeanGrey said...
Jun. 1, 2010 at 8:22 pm
I like it. Very uniquely done.
 
MayaElyashiv This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jun. 1, 2010 at 10:27 pm
Thank you! :D
 
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