What Does an Artist Eat for Breakfast?

January 19, 2010
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While walking out the door
On my way to school,
After waking up
Ten minutes earlier and
Not having time to eat,
I think about
What artists eat for breakfast…
Probably something to show
That they’re better than left-brained bozos.
Maybe some fancy organic oatmeal
Or fresh strawberry jam on whole-wheat bread
Or free range eggs with hashbrowns

How am I supposed to know
What an artist eats for breakfast?
I don’t even have breakfast anymore,
Except on weekends.
And when I was a kid,
All I had was sugar…
Froot Loops or Apple Jacks,
Reese’s Puffs or Honey Nut Cheerios,
Frosted Flakes or Cinnamon Toast Crunch.
If not cereal, it was Toaster Strudels
Or Poptarts.
And I’ll never forget that one time,
When I poured a bowl of Lucky Charms…
There were no marshmallows!
I was crushed, mad-out-of-my-mind
When I found out my sisters ate them all.
They intentionally stole all the “Charms”
From their little brother…
It’s no wonder I no longer eat breakfast.
So I can only speculate about artists,
And their special little morning gems…

I’m just gonna keep on going,
With my no-school-day-breakfast policy
And drink a 6 Hour Power (spoof of 5 Hour Energy)
After eating my granola bar during study hall.
Artists can have their organic-this and free-range-that.
All I need is a good lunch, and a bigger dinner.
And of course, just like sleep, catch up on the weekends…

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