She Makes Children Cry

December 15, 2009
By , Hadley, MA
Dark and dreary
Windowless box
Pitch black torture
Shadows cast down
On her mournful face

She can’t get out
She can’t escape
She’s trapped with her demons
In a 10 by 10 foot box

It's brutally painful
It's scornfully lost
It's tragic and lonely
It's a forgotten situation

She hears the child scream
The child cries at night
The child will never love
The child will never forget

She loses track of time
The tears fall each and every day
In the dark and shattered world
Her guilt will never leave

She thinks of all the eyes
How she couldn't help it
How she twisted each of their hearts
And stole their complete innocence

She asked politely for a new brain
But rewards don’t come easily in this life
She pleaded for someone to save her
But nets are limited here on Earth

Who knew torment could last this long?
Who knew despair could survive?
She must not have begged enough
She must not have tried enough

Her future was shattered years before
It seemed potential was all she ever had
They all thought she was going to make it
But only she understood her fate

The guards deliver her food
She knows she’ll die if she doesn’t force it down
She chokes it down with disgusted strength
She throws it back up in defeat

She sits in a pool of her own vomit
She screams and adds tears to the mix
She grabs the rusty nail
And hacks at her arms
Until the blood covers the vomit

But it’s not enough
So she grabs her hair
And pulls hard
Then she throws the clumps into the pile

A guard walks by
With a pitiful glance
She grasps the bars for support
And bangs her head on the concrete walls

She seemed to lean on all but herself
Now the all have gone
And she’s left with nothing
She’s left with no one

She knew it would never stop
She knew thoughts couldn’t leave
She knew it would end this way
It was simply a matter of time

She slept at 2 AM
When they broke in and handcuffed her
I think she knew what was happening
But thought it couldn’t be true

It seemed ironic
They grabbed her in the night and dark
In the midst of her despair
And shoved her into more darkness

She told herself
“This is what you get
For thinking life
Just couldn’t get worse.”

She tries to hear hope
Resonating in her mind
But hope has long past
In the decisions she has made

The cell is small
And dimly lit
She must be off to hell
The demons will deliver her themselves

She thought she was pathetic
But now she just doesn’t know
Doesn’t know what the word may be now
For what she did
And who she has become.

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