Why Am I Here? [Part 1]

November 22, 2009
By , Orlando, FL
Big feet above my little eyes,
Hands swing and scoop out my life.
Not a moment to stand an inch tall,
As they wash me away to nothing at all.

Can I walk away now?
Can I just say no?
For some reason, I don’t know how
And that leaves me with nowhere to go.

The people that you knew-
Are people you don’t know.
The love that they portrayed,
Was proven all for show.

So I sit her in my closet
And sit on a bunch of clothes,
The feelings my heart deposits
Is spilled throughout my poems.

I just thought of suicide
Because I just found some pills,
But now as I continue to write
I see a hole that needs to be filled.

I’ve tried to put love
Within these empty walls,
Stuffing kindness and placing smiles
clearly were they don’t belong.

I feel like a crumbled cookie,
Broken and fallen apart.
No one wanted me from the beginning..

And I realized that with all my heart-

Scattered on the table,
The floor and on the bed,
Used and completely forgotten;
I still remember what he said….

You brung up your past deeds
Like you’re some kind of hero,
But when you’re like this to me
You’re more like a zero!

I feel too sweet,
Too nice and compassionate.
People walk all over me
Like I have “EASY” on my forehead!

The man who says he loves me,
Has just proved love’s a lie.
The man I spent almost 2 years with,
Has burned my heart alive.

I scream out and cry inside,
As the darkness overwhelms my eyes.
Doesn’t really matter now,
Because no one can hear me die.

The silent treatment
never felt so good,
As I stare at these pills
And wonder if I should…

I feel the truth is-
If I die, all will be better said.
They were born without me
And they’ll live if I were dead!

They don’t call me,
Love me or care.
So I ponder the thoughts,
“Why am I here?”

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