Even To Myself

December 2, 2009
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I’ve got nothing to say
At least noting I want to admit
I can’t admit that I have feelings
That I have doubts
I can’t admit that I’m afraid
And how it feels like no one is around
I can’t admit that I get angry
So mad sometimes it hurts
I can’t admit that I feel pain
Or that I need someone to help take it away
I can’t admit how I failed
How I am not able to be strong
I can’t admit that I don’t know what I want
Or what I need
I can’t admit I don’t know
The difference between the two
I can’t admit I want you
Or that I need you
I can’t admit that what you did will never be ok
Or that we can’t ever be us again
I can’t admit how much it hurts to let you go
Or how it would hurt even more to let you stay
I can’t admit that I gave you my heart
And that you broke it in two
I can’t admit that I can’t decide
If I love your or hate you
I can’t admit I’m crying on the inside as I tell you goodbye

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