Goodbye Forever | Teen Ink

Goodbye Forever

November 28, 2009
By LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.


The Whole Time You Were Talking,
I Didn’t Hear A Single Word You Said.
Because The Whole Time You Were Talking,
I Was Picturing You Dead.
Sitting there with that crooked smile
On your face.
And my heart shows the expression
On my face.
Your smile begins to fade,
As we sit there in the shade.
Waiting for my reply
I just wish you would die.
You ask me if I’m okay,
But I just want you to go away.
I want to get up and walk
But you just want to sit there and talk.
But I’m done with you,
And I’m being true.
You broke my heart
So now we’ve grown apart,
We never were together,
Even though I hoped for forever.
So goodbye you stupid heart breaker.
And don’t follow me, okay?
I don’t want to see you anymore today.


The author's comments:
eh.

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This article has 4 comments.


on Dec. 27 2009 at 12:05 pm
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.

i wasn't rushing it.

Kay4theRoses said...
on Dec. 27 2009 at 7:43 am
Kay4theRoses, O&#39brien, Florida
0 articles 0 photos 75 comments

Favorite Quote:
"all's fair in love and war." And "Beware of a fat man whose belly doesn't jiggle when he laughs."-A Chinese philosopher. =)

i agree with Nicovera, the beginning was good. i like the first par. but in the end it sounds like you got all your honest emotion out of it and just rushed it.

on Dec. 14 2009 at 6:49 pm
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.

I didn't really try to add the stupid lol. but i really couldn't think of anything else at the moment. and... i don't know it flowed with it. X) I was actually trying to use childish to show that he just might be mean enough to actually make young ones cry but it didn't go as deep as i thought it would. anyways... thanks for your feedback! :D

on Dec. 14 2009 at 6:17 pm
Arluanna PLATINUM, Broken Arrow, Oklahoma
31 articles 2 photos 99 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Mwahahahahaha! Now you are mine, Lesley-Bird, finally, at last, in my... oh, drat, forgot it had wings...”

-Phil, the youngest Kalins Uzin

I really liked the first 8 lines or so! The ending was good too, but it could use a little work. "Stupid", for example, seems like an elementary thing for you to write. Overall, very good.


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