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To Roam Alone

somewhere

along the way

across the bridge

through the forest



i roamed
somewhere

in a darkened city

known best for its gun fights

i fell down an uncovered sewerage hole





and lost my sight
somehow

maybe then

maybe now

i cloned myself in a labratory




to study myself

i watch how i move
i watch how i speak
i watch my expressions
(the difficulty in deciphering them
disturbing me)

who am i? who is she?
the girl who cries




the girl so weak
who is she? who art thou? the girl who hides her emotions




the girl so strong
am i her? is she me?

are these feelings true




or fragments in a dream
is she faking? exaggerating?
imagining pain and hurt-
if she's lying to me




me to myself




would it be so much worse?

does my mind know her heart?
does it connect, understand?
are we siamese twins?
can we comprehend-
one another

raising my right (to check)
she lifts her left (to check)
palms identical, close but not touching



will we merge together if we join hands?



will we have the same goals, the same plans?



do we share enough




so much, this photocopy of me



or is she just a reflection



nothing more
leaving me to roam alone
by myself


wandering aimlessly


searching for the lost half
searching for my eyes


night vision goggles




that see into pitch black abyss




and spot the light




beaming white




shining bright






waiting






at the other end





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