I sit in a corner,
in a little room,
consumed by thoughts of you.

I feel ever beat,
every pulse,
and ever heart ache.

I think,
my insides screaming out,
bleeding,
filling and over flowing.

My thoughts rushing and blushing.
The painful beating of the dust shards of my shattered heart.

Each pulse overtaken by ten times the sorrow of every made-made war,
as I try to comfort myself.

Be still aching heart...

Be strong,
No matter how hard and hopeless it seems.
I promise, a promise of fulfillment again.

And then...

The reminding wounds of my past,
every gash,
every cut in my heart reopened.

Releasing the bottled up feelings kept away from the world seems so hard.

The shrieks and strings,
the never-ending malignant beings,
trying to cloud my judgment and emotion to my dismay.

I scream, but nothing is heard.
All I feel is my anguish,
my mistakes,
actions,
faults,
and demise.

I call out for someone to save me,
take away the pain.
Pull me away from myself.
I need nothing more than love.

And now comes the part that I wish I could tell you honestly,

"Caught by my love,
the only one I think of,
the only one I dream of...

The one I would,
over all else,
hold above my heart if rejuvinated,
redone,
reborn.

I stare into my loves eyes,

'Thank you. I love you.'

They tear up,
feeling the pain and whisper,

'I love you too.'"

And I will forever and always, but I've got to find you first.

So until then I sit here in the company of my swirling thoughts and painful,
saddened heart.