Pressure

October 17, 2009
By tennisislovee34 GOLD, Sterling Heights, Michigan
tennisislovee34 GOLD, Sterling Heights, Michigan
15 articles 3 photos 91 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every moment of your life, you're writing. Even in your dreams, you're writing. When you walk the halls in this school you meet various people and you write furiously in your head." -Frank McCourt


Having trouble looking, searching, facing, thoughts are quickly racing. Pros and cons, weighing some facts, it's time to see which one will last.

Walking, running, chasing, this heart is really pacing. Breathing gets hard, nerves get tense, it feels like the fear of running into a fence.

Rope is yanking, choking, pulling, wraps around a neck. A heart pangs inside as the mind whispers, "Go ahead."

A throat is hurting, screaming, burning like hell. Not a soul hears a single yell. Time stands still, freezes in place. Now it's time to step away from this case.

Stopping, thinking, doing, legs become straight and the rope hangs alone. Lights flicker off, a car drives home.


The author's comments:
I wrote this in my creative writing class as a narrative poem. I didn't know what to write about at first, and somehow suicide kept nagging at me. I've never written anything dark like this before, and I wanted to give it a try. My friend urged me to try it, so I went home and had fun with it, and a couple hours later, this is what I came up with. I really like it, and I hope when people read about it they see that sometimes when people are thinking about suicide, sometimes they don't want to kill themselves, and sometimes, it's a battle inside them mentally, arguing whether they should die or not.

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This article has 24 comments.


on Apr. 14 2010 at 9:07 pm
tennisislovee34 GOLD, Sterling Heights, Michigan
15 articles 3 photos 91 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every moment of your life, you're writing. Even in your dreams, you're writing. When you walk the halls in this school you meet various people and you write furiously in your head." -Frank McCourt

awe thanks guys! that is very nice of both of you and i really appreciate it!

on Jan. 11 2010 at 7:53 pm
sasssgirrrl22 PLATINUM, Pearl River, New York
29 articles 0 photos 267 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Giving up is not a part of my vocabulary."
"Don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game."
"Truth be told I miss ya, truth be told I'm lying."

agree wit shambler. I hav read alot of realy gr8 articlez on here & this is def 1 of em. awesome descriptionz 2 ;P

on Jan. 7 2010 at 8:45 pm
Shambler92 PLATINUM, Buenos Aires, Other
37 articles 0 photos 65 comments
Man, since i've discovered this webpage, this is probably the best poem i've read, and the only one that relies a lot on structure and good writing and feeling as well. amazing job

on Nov. 9 2009 at 8:06 pm
tennisislovee34 GOLD, Sterling Heights, Michigan
15 articles 3 photos 91 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every moment of your life, you're writing. Even in your dreams, you're writing. When you walk the halls in this school you meet various people and you write furiously in your head." -Frank McCourt

yeah, asap! :)

on Nov. 9 2009 at 2:56 pm
LeilaniLives PLATINUM, Fort Wayne, Indiana
42 articles 11 photos 128 comments

Favorite Quote:
"They say 'Life's two steps forward and one step back' - But what if I tripped and fell down the whole flight of stairs?"

Sure thing, but if you could get around to it, I'd appreciate that.

on Nov. 8 2009 at 5:14 pm
tennisislovee34 GOLD, Sterling Heights, Michigan
15 articles 3 photos 91 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every moment of your life, you're writing. Even in your dreams, you're writing. When you walk the halls in this school you meet various people and you write furiously in your head." -Frank McCourt

sure thing! i don't have time right now, but i will be more than happy to look at your work within the next week :)

on Nov. 7 2009 at 9:20 pm
LeilaniLives PLATINUM, Fort Wayne, Indiana
42 articles 11 photos 128 comments

Favorite Quote:
"They say 'Life's two steps forward and one step back' - But what if I tripped and fell down the whole flight of stairs?"

Sure thing, you really deserve it. Would you like to check out any of my work? I'd absolutely love it if you commented/gave criticism.

on Nov. 5 2009 at 5:49 pm
tennisislovee34 GOLD, Sterling Heights, Michigan
15 articles 3 photos 91 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every moment of your life, you're writing. Even in your dreams, you're writing. When you walk the halls in this school you meet various people and you write furiously in your head." -Frank McCourt

yeah i like him a lotttt :x lol guys have treated me horrible before, like horrible beyond belief, and then he's there, total proof not all guys are the same :)

and i am actually working on a poem right now in my creative writing class, and the poem has to be based off of words we cut out of magazines, and it's about how i feel about him. however, i think after i'll write one where i don't have to work with only words i find in a magazine unless the magazine poem turns out well :)

thanks so much :)

poems=life said...
on Nov. 4 2009 at 9:03 pm
woah it sounds like you like him alot? aw thats very cute, i hope your exited because it sounds like he will be ok. if not ill beat him up for you. :P

why dont you right a poem about how you feel about him? since you feel stongly it might come out really good?

on Nov. 4 2009 at 5:01 pm
tennisislovee34 GOLD, Sterling Heights, Michigan
15 articles 3 photos 91 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every moment of your life, you're writing. Even in your dreams, you're writing. When you walk the halls in this school you meet various people and you write furiously in your head." -Frank McCourt

awe thanks :) he's amazzinggg, i've never met anyone like him. i'm pretty sure he'll treat me right because honestly, it has never felt this right to be around someone before :) i thank you for caring :)

and it took me a couple hours to actually write the poem, but i did edit it for about a week before i got the polished piece finished :)

and i'd have to say my favorite line is "Rope is yanking, choking, pulling, wraps around a neck. A heart pangs inside as the mind whispers, “Go ahead.”" because everyone says they get goosebumps at that line, and i think it really shows how the person is unsure, and really doesn't want to kill him/herself.

poems=life said...
on Nov. 2 2009 at 8:34 pm
oooo allmost boyfrind lol. congrads! i hope he treats you right missy. a few last questions : 1) what is your favorite line from this poem and why? 2) how long did it take you? 3) your bf better be a good one. lol not a question sorry

on Nov. 1 2009 at 4:19 pm
tennisislovee34 GOLD, Sterling Heights, Michigan
15 articles 3 photos 91 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every moment of your life, you're writing. Even in your dreams, you're writing. When you walk the halls in this school you meet various people and you write furiously in your head." -Frank McCourt

well i'm good now but i did have no one to talk to. but now i have a best friend and an amazing almost-boyfriend, so life is looking very up :) i do really like this poem, i'm proud of it :) thanks a lot!

poems=life said...
on Oct. 31 2009 at 4:30 pm
well how do you like the result? do you like the face that it is dark? my poems kinda get dark sometimes i love it but sometimes im not too sure. how are you with this poem?

you had noone to talk to? :(

on Oct. 31 2009 at 11:54 am
tennisislovee34 GOLD, Sterling Heights, Michigan
15 articles 3 photos 91 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every moment of your life, you're writing. Even in your dreams, you're writing. When you walk the halls in this school you meet various people and you write furiously in your head." -Frank McCourt

awe, thanks! and we had to write a narrative poem in my creative writing class and i've never written anything dark before, and i did go through a depression, so i was pulling a lot of feelings from that and created a thought process for someone who had no one to talk to

poems=life said...
on Oct. 29 2009 at 6:30 pm
i think this is really outstanding! how its written very well and i like the layout. what inspired you to write this?

userspay said...
on Oct. 28 2009 at 6:16 am
i love it <3

on Oct. 26 2009 at 2:23 pm
tennisislovee34 GOLD, Sterling Heights, Michigan
15 articles 3 photos 91 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every moment of your life, you're writing. Even in your dreams, you're writing. When you walk the halls in this school you meet various people and you write furiously in your head." -Frank McCourt

thank you that means a lottt :)

on Oct. 25 2009 at 10:20 pm
LeilaniLives PLATINUM, Fort Wayne, Indiana
42 articles 11 photos 128 comments

Favorite Quote:
"They say 'Life's two steps forward and one step back' - But what if I tripped and fell down the whole flight of stairs?"

I'd have to say it was very creative for a person who hasn't actually felt this way.

on Oct. 25 2009 at 7:47 pm
tennisislovee34 GOLD, Sterling Heights, Michigan
15 articles 3 photos 91 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every moment of your life, you're writing. Even in your dreams, you're writing. When you walk the halls in this school you meet various people and you write furiously in your head." -Frank McCourt

thank you so much! that means a lot :) I'm glad you liked it!

on Oct. 25 2009 at 4:07 pm
ameerrante GOLD, Chester, Connecticut
14 articles 0 photos 7 comments
I haven't seen a poem structured like this before, it's very creative. I like how you didn't jump into the actual suicide, you let it drag out. You showed the thought process, the feelings, the actions - and you never wrote about suicide directly, you showed the background that leads towrads it. Very well done !


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