I.Just.Wish

September 12, 2009
By SapphireDew BRONZE, Seoul, Other
SapphireDew BRONZE, Seoul, Other
3 articles 0 photos 0 comments

I feel your fingers
Search for mine
Fingertips feeling the air
Until they close around mine

But my heart sinks
A sudden wave of reluctance washing over me
Not those waves you see ebb away
But those waves that refuse to return to sea

This isn’t what I want
A month of flowers and hearts
I suddenly realize
That nagging voice from the start
That voice I deemed as so insignificant
Has come back to haunt me

Every time I see you
I expect my heart to do a little jump
This time I feel nothing but a dull throb
The butterflies in my stomach
The dampness of my hands
All gone
Just like that

One by one
The pieces fall
The debris forming a small mound
At the bottom of my heart
But I can’t ever imagine
What will happen to yours
When I say those three words

Three words?
Most think of
I.Love.You
Those three words
Adorned with feather wings and a halo
Did I tell you?
Mine are adorned with bruises and cracks?

Too many to choose from
I.Hate.You
Just Friends,Okay?
Just.Stay.Away
Don’t.Love.You
I choose the one that hurts you the least

The one…
I just can’t finish…
I.Just.Wish


The author's comments:
This is from my personal experience. It's a poem talking about a girl in a relationship. One day when he tries to hold her hand, she realizes that she doesn’t want to be in a relationship with him. The “nagging” voice from the start was a voice telling her that it’s not a good idea to go into the relationship, she ends up ignoring that voice, only to find that it came back to haunt her. So as the days go by she tries to think of ways to tell him that she doesn’t want this (relationship) anymore, but ends up “losing the battle, each and every time.”

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