Sorry Not Sorry 2

December 18, 2017
Im tired of dealing with my broken heart every night
And Im tired of being torn apart every single fight
When I have a fight with a guy that’ll leave me
Fill me lies and say that he need me
He said that he loved me and I was believing
Until I saw he was toxic and everything was deceiving
I realize I didn’t deserve the treatment I was receiving
So I packed up my bags and I started leaving
He didn’t even beg for me, he didn’t drop to the floor
He just watched as I walked out the door
That night I cried so much and had watery eyes
I laid in bed and Kept on asking myself “why?”
I told myself I was done, I said that I was through
Until one day, I ran into you
I shot you down at the very start
Because I was afraid you’d break my heart
I was protecting myself from another toxic person
I didn’t want to cry myself to sleep or end up hurting
As I watch you leave me when you start deserting
And I get mad at myself and start cursing
But you wanted to prove me that you weren’t like other guys
As I heard your words, I didn’t think they were lies
I let you prove that you weren’t the same
Then you did and that messed with my brain
You actually owned up to what you said
And I couldn’t control the thoughts in my head
I gave you a chance and we started dating
You made me forget about the guys in my past that I was hating
We’ve been together for 11 months, almost a year
We’ve been through hell and back to get here
You made me fall in love so fast
I didn’t even see behind your mask
I didn’t notice you were turning into those guys from my past
I had a feeling that you were bringing somebody in your home
One night, you were taking a shower and I was alone
So I looked through your phone
I didn’t know what I expected to find
But when I saw it, I acted like I was blind
I didn’t want to know, I didn’t want to see
I only kept thinking that you loved me
I loved you and I thought you loved me back
Then things lost control and became out of tack
What you did made me so heated
So I talked to you and you admitted you cheated
I forgave you and I thought it was over
But I still felt the pain weighing down my shoulders
I only wanted us to live a happy life
But you messed up again and I had to pay the price
Every filthy word you said, I was believing
Until I found out that you were still cheating
I couldn’t believe that every day
I believed every lie that you could say
And you hurt me in so many ways
But I still wanted to stay
At this point, I don’t know what to do
I cant keep doing this, I’m through
Im sorry to say but I’m done with you
I’ll admit, I did have fun with you
We were half and half, I wanted to be the one with you
But you wanted to creep off with her in the night
Or go to her house whenever you and I have a fight
You formed a bond with her and y’all was tight
But I got a negative vibe from y’all and it didn’t feel right
You looked at her more than just a friend
You talked about her non stop like it would never end
You want another chance? I’m sorry but never again
You’re falling in love with her even if you can’t see
I saw the way you look at her, it’s the way you use to look at me
I never wanted to admit that we were bad for each other
I wanted to focus on love we had for each other
But we can’t be happy now because of what you did with her
You’re no longer the person I thought you were
It’s over between us and we both know
Its time for me to let you go
I knew this from the start
That you would end up breaking my heart
I fell in love with you but at the wrong time
Times were good when you were still mine
Trust me, I’ll miss being called yours
But I cant let myself get hurt anymore
So I wiped my eyes and walked out the door
As the bond we created finally tore
I really learned something this day
I don’t deserve to be treated this way
Im not gonna keep getting hurt by you or any guy
Im not gonna believe every lie
Im gonna find a guy worth my time
Someone who is proud to be called “mine”
Im gonna find somebody who will treat me the way I’m suppose to be treated
So I can prevent the pain and things like this won’t get repeated
So I’m sorry for not being what you wanted or needed
But I’m definitely not sorry for leaving





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